Forget football, baseball, arm wrestling, or loud bodily function noises contests, when it comes to competition,men have nothing on women. Honestly if any heterosexual men even had a clue what it was like to have that extra X chromosome they would be wearing high heels, getting botox, and having the fat sucked out of their thighs on a daily basis. They would be comparing lipstick brands, manicurists, and Coach handbags, and losing sleep over what to wear to work the next day.
For all you men who think that women are dressing up, putting on make-up and spending hours and hours on their hair for you, well that’s a bunch of BS. Women like to look good for other women, or should we like to say we like to look better than all the other women in the room and if we had our wish, the planet.
It’s a rooted phenomenon that has lead to “poison apples,backstage beauty pageant sabotage”, and quite a famous “swimming pool fight” on Dynasty.
It’s a rather silent and unspoken rule actually, we all know we do it, we all know we think it, and we all know everybody else is doing it to us, but we would never verbally admit it. It makes us look shallow, self-absorbed and vain. However, its a natural instinct that we are born with, so get used to it.
This is why we smile when our friend gets a great new pair of shoes, jump for joy when she gets engaged, or practically wet our pants when she loses 15 pounds, but secretly there is a little part of us that just wants to “kill the bitch”… lol.
That being said, you would wonder why any woman who looks like Skeletor, loses all her hair, has chicken legs that can barely stand up to even put on a pair of cute shoes,feels like she is the queen bee, next to the flocks of gorgeous women in the Universe with healthy beautiful bodies.
Well here is a little portal into the head of an anorexic. You actually feel more powerful than those woman who to you obviously must hate their bigger bodies, loath their regular looking stomachs and have absolutely no will power of self-control when it comes to food. Women are somehow taught from a young age that the lower the weight, the more in control you are. When you can say that you have the lowest number on that scale, have eaten the least amount of calories that day, and wear the smallest size of skinny jeans amongst the majority of other females, you get this incredible feeling of satisfaction. It’s impossible to be the prettiest girl in the room, but you can with a little effort, a lot of missed meals, and several trips to the gym, make yourself the thinnest.
The only thing that ticks off the skinniest girl in the world, besides butter and anything that is deep fried, is when another girl comes in and steals all her thunder by being thinner. It’s like the tiara, the banner, and the title get stripped and suddenly somebody has more power, more self-control, and more power.
I remember being that skinniest girl in the world, and you can imagine that at 54 pounds I pretty much had immunity when it came to the Anorexic world. The only girls who had anything on me were probably corpses, and being that they didn’t get around much, probably didn’t pose much of a threat.
In the real world, you pretty much are the only cockatoo in the room who actually thinks looking like death is pretty, but when you get into a room with 20 other cockatoo’s all fighting for the same crown…well you better just watch your bony little back.
If this seems odd to you,than it should. It’s also probably why so many people with eating disorders have trouble getting better. Getting better means losing your crown and giving it up to some other skinny bitch.. yep,estrogen and lack of nutrition can make for a very bad combination.
No matter what, there is always going to be somebody prettier than you, smarter than you, skinnier than you, and in numerous cases “has her foot in the grave one step ahead of you.”
In my next blog I am going take you into the mind of somebody whose only goal in life is to be the best Anorexic in the world and God help the skinnier Bitch who stands in her way….stay tuned.