The death of Isabelle Caro isn’t entirely shocking, but it is deeply sad. I first came across Isabelle when I saw her on Jessica Simpson’s VH1 show The Price of Beauty.  She was shockingly skinny and discussed the ad campaign that ran during fashion week, the one where she was photographed naked to show the world how anorexia ravaged her body and ruined her modeling career.

I am saddened to hear she lost her battle with anorexia.  But I am also shocked to hear some people criticize her for not trying to win.  Anorexia is a mental illness.  While she was willing to be photographed and show the world what the disease did to her I think she was far from pro-Ana.

Battling an eating disorder means you are not in charge of the rational side of your brain.  Why else would a person knowingly starve themselves to death?  Refusing to eat food, ignoring hunger signals and physically letting their body get too weak to work anymore.

Instead of looking at her as weak for not fighting harder- we should see her as a victim and example of how far the disease can take a person.  Isabelle is not a survivor, she is a victim.  She didn’t win the battle.

I recovered from 18 years struggling with eds, body image and self esteem, so I know firsthand how this takes over your life.  I have dedicated my life to helping raise awareness for eating disorders and treatment.

Eating disorders are the deadliest form of mental illness.  How could anyone think Isabelle would knowingly go out and promote her illness.  She shared.  She went public, but her body and mind were no longer her own.  Eating disorders are a tiny little voice that starts very small in a person’s head.  And when left untreated they take over the person, so they are no longer in charge.  They sometimes appear to be the person you remember or they may seem to get better.  But the disease is in charge.  It is good at being sneaky, lying and doing everything it can to keep the person hostage.

I don’t know the details or her treatment or overall struggle.  But I know myself and as a very strong, highly intelligent, successful person my disease continually pulled me under.  I wasn’t lucky enough to know I needed inpatient treatment.  As a perfectionist, I thought that I never ever needed treatment.  Well, I would have fleeting moments where I realized I needed help.  But those  moments of trying therapy that were followed by returning to the comfort of my rituals.  Going to the gym for three hours filled me more than talking about my problems.  And it takes a lot of good treatment to learn to stop that behavior.

I am really very lucky to be alive today.  I commend anyone who is able to seek treatment and follow through.  This is the fight of your life.  Literally.

Rest in peace Isabelle.

Finally Free,

Bridget Loves